It doesn’t take long after becoming a parent to realize that there are a lot of parenting controversies out there. For example, parents of infants will butt heads over topics like breastfeeding vs. bottle feeding and sleep training vs. not sleep training. Now that my oldest has left the baby and toddler years, I’m encountering new controversies. One that has come as a surprise to me is the topic of chores.
Chores—the routine tasks required to keep a home running—are controversial! Parents fall into two general camps when it comes to chores:
- Some parents believe that chores are beneficial to children. Their reasons vary, but most of these parents believe that chores encourage kids to be responsible and help prepare them for adulthood.
- Some parents believe that kids shouldn’t be required to do chores because they are just kids. They feel that the “work” of childhood is play, so kids should be allowed to do this without being bogged down by chore charts. They believe that kids will pick up the skills that chores build (how to do laundry, how to cook, etc.) as they independently develop interests in the skills or develop the desire to help a parent with the tasks.
I’m unashamedly in favor of chores. The way I see it, my kids are part of a family. In my house, our family works together to achieve common goals. One goal is being good stewards of the blessings God has given us. Another goal is having a home that is clean enough and organized enough that we can feel comfortable and be safe. Another goal is being able to welcome friends, family members, and even strangers into our home for fellowship. All of these goals require that we complete routine tasks like mowing the lawn, doing the dishes, and vacuuming. Each family member has something to contribute when it comes to completing these tasks and achieving our shared goals.
Though I think children should complete chores, I’m actually not a fan of the term “chores.” This is because I see these tasks as an everyday part of life in a household, not some compartmentalized duty. I realize that this is a pretty broad perspective on chores, but there are some very specific benefits I believe chores provide.
How chores benefit kids
- Chores teach life skills.
- Chores help kids feel like they are contributing to the family.
- Chores help kids understand the benefits of contributing so they are more likely to contribute in settings outside of the home (such as by volunteering with community groups).
- Chores teach responsibility and time management.
- Chores prepare kids for later employment.
- Chores take some of the burden off mom and dad so the family runs more smoothly.
- Chores help kids be grateful because they stop taking things like clean clothes and empty trashcans for granted.
It turns out that a number of studies echo my sentiments. One study (cited in this article) showed that adults who did chores as young kids were more likely to be well-adjusted, have better relationships with family and friends, and be more successful in their careers. Another study (cited in this article) found that chores teach children how to be empathetic and responsive to others’ needs. These benefits aren’t trivial!
Final thoughts
There are a lot of chore-related topics we could discuss that are beyond the scope of this post (age-appropriate chores, how to assign chores, whether or not to reward kids for doing chores, etc.). Perhaps I will explore some of these in the future. For now, though, I’d love to hear your thoughts on the topic of chores.
Do your kids have chores? Why or why not? For those of you who do require your children to complete chores, do you feel these benefit your kids or would they be better off without them?
