Grandparenting is Great Because of Perspective

I’m honored that today’s post is a guest contribution from my father, Roland Thiel. He wrote this piece a few years ago to express why he loves being a grandfather. Though he never intended for it to be a blog post, he sent it to me a few weeks ago and asked if I would like to share it here. I think many of you will appreciate it, especially with Father’s Day being just around the corner.

Every time we’re together, Malachi, Jacob, Ethan, Amaris and Nitara help me understand why I love being a grandfather.

My grandchildren also stretch my memory for a generation, and they remind me why I love every moment I’ve been a father (although I may not have been the best).

The pure, simple, untamed love of a child is a gift—a gift from God, but also from that child. The extent of this love is boundless, and I reciprocate this love as fully as a grown man’s heart can stretch.

Many grandparent jokes circle around the premise that grandparenting is better than parenting. The standard line claims grandparenting is better because grandparents aren’t required to do the hard or unpleasant jobs of raising children. You get to spoil the child and then return them to their parents.

That’s true to a degree, but I have taken my turn at changing poopy diapers for two generations of our family. I eagerly have played games with my grandchildren over and over and over until my eyes crossed, given my undivided attention to the same book being read, watched the same video, or listened to the same story. I hold this excitement of grandparenting willingly with the passion I have given few endeavors. Ultimately, that’s when you truly show a small child your deep and abiding love.

Still, most grandparents relinquish some of the hard responsibility of childcare to parents. Eventually, the grandparent or the grandchild has to go home. I’d say that’s a trade-off to parenting. Sure, a parent rarely gets a break, but a parent also gets to be there all the time. A parent hears the first word and watches the first step. A parent glimpses the light of understanding click on. A parent shares splendidly opportune moments that grandparents miss.

All that aside, one quality of grandparenting surpasses parenting: Thanks to the gift of experience, a grandparent truly appreciates the fleeting nature of childhood. That knowledge makes every second spent with the grandchild precious. It penetrates the present with a joy too sweet to be savored fully and completely the first time around. A grandparent must return over and over to renew this joy.

A grandparent understands exactly how rapidly each phase of life flees. A grandparent realizes that in a few blinks of an eye, their children and grandchildren will be leaving home. While a parent must move on to the next task, a grandparent enjoys the luxury of drinking deeply at the fountain of in-the-moment awareness.

That isn’t to say it’s always easy. Two-year-olds still throw tantrums. Eight-year-olds develop attitudes and want it their own way. But grandparents know this, too, shall pass. Grandparenting Malachi, Jacob, Ethan, Amaris and Nitara reminds me this gift of life is fragile, not to be taken casually.

My grandchildren have the privilege of having other grandparents. How could I possibly measure up? Of course, grandparenting isn’t a competition. We should not spend the precious moments with our grandchildren in competition but in embracing the fact they are blessed with having others that love and care for them so deeply. The other grandparents and I should be complementing each other in the love and affection we pour on our grandchildren. We should take the time and opportunity to pass on our experiences and wisdom to these young ones, as this will help build their foundation for the future.

Doing that is pure bliss, especially when Malachi, Jacob, Ethan, Amaris and Nitara call me by the special names (Grandpa, MeBop) they have chosen for me. When they grab my finger to take me somewhere, take my hand to take a walk to the park, want to play on the playground, read a book, slide down my legs, ask me to play Minecraft, build Legos, look for tumbleweeds, make paper airplanes, build/rebuild a playset, or gather more balls. Sometimes it’s just being able to watch them during an opportunity to video chat.

With all of this said, our grandchildren are deeply etched in our minds, our bodies, and hearts as we look forward to the next chapter the endeavor of grandparenting brings.

Yep, grandparenting is great but it’s all about perspective.

Roland lives in Colorado with his wife of 38 years. Though he is retired, be keeps busy with woodworking and playing with his grandkids. He will welcome his sixth grandchild this fall.  

Shared at the following:

Modest Monday, Over the Moon, and Tuesdays with a Twist.